Even in the middle of things like
book releases,
book tours, and author events, life goes on and so does my teaching career. In case you're wondering, yes, t
eaching is hard. But we're not gluttons for punishment. We have plenty of reasons why we do what we do. Here are a few of mine:
It's Getting Hot in Here...
“You
may want to take your jacket off. It's gets pretty warm in here.”
Student
just looked at me, so I explained, “You know, because I'm smokin'.”
He
gave me a half smirk & went to hang up his jacket. From the hall I heard, “Miss
Boucher's been smoking!”
So
Creepy
A
handyman was perched on a ladder working on something in the ceiling. He could
only be seen from the waist down. Children passed by on their way to lunch.
“Whoa...”
“That's
creepy!”
Apparently they thought it was half a human hanging up there. I was too amused to correct them.
Any
Questions?
“Does
anyone have any questions?” The unsuspecting student teacher asked. One
child raises his hand.
“Yes?”
“What
does the fox say? Ring a ding da ding da ding ding!”
Beer.
On a Wednesday Morning
Feeling
like she needs a burst of energy, the teacher cracked open a Diet Coke. “Teacher,
is that your beer?” A student inquired innocently.
Astronaut
Let
me preface this by saying that our school mascot is an Astronaut. Pictured on
my school shirt, the children were trying to guess what it was one day.
“It's
a man!” one called out excitedly.
Being
the helpful teacher I am, I gave them a clue. “It starts with aaaaa...” They
look at me blankly. “Aaaaaa...” I cue them. "Sssss..."
One
dude perks up. “Ass man!” Yes, my friend, I
long to say. This is our school mascot, the ass man.
Big
Baby
Kindergartners
have a difficult time with numbered dot-to-dots. I'm not sure why, but they do.
By the time I came to the aid of one student, he had connected 1, 3, 4, 5, and 2.
So I tried to help him understand. “So you're growing up. You're 3 years old,
then 4, 5. Then you go back to 2? You're a baby again?”
That was apparently the wrong thing to say.
“I'm
not a baby!” he blustered. “I'm a big baby!”
Of
course I didn't make fun of him. I was too busy laughing.
My Hands Aren't Black
When
you run cardstock through the industrial strength copier, the ink rubs off on your
fingers. My students discovered this during an activity and made numerous comments about how their hands were turning black.
One of the African American
students piped up. “My hands aren't black.”
No one responded so he said
it again, more loudly. Still no response.
So he repeated it again. “My hands aren't black! Because I'm already black!”
I
had to walk away and laugh somewhere else.
* * *
I'd love to hear your silly kids moments. Leave me a comment below! And here's a little something extra, just for you.
Kid Definitions:
Skunky: when something smells bad.
Instinct: when you stink in your body.
Chummy: when something is super duper huggable (ex: a teddy bear).
